“Teddy Bear Wala Dost”
Ek baar ka zikr hai… nahi, yeh koi fairytale nahi hai. Na yahan koi raja hai, na rani. Yeh us insaan ki kahani hai jo har din logo ke saamne hass ke milta hai, lekin raat ko sirf apne ceiling fan ko ghoorta rehta hai. Haan, woh main hoon.
Main itna acha actor ban gaya hoon ki agar Filmfare Best Pretend-Happy Performance ka award hota, to main har saal jeetta. Har rishte mein mujhe pretend karna padta hai — ki main khush hoon, sab theek hai, life mast chal rahi hai. Par andar se… khaali. Jaise ek well jisme kab ka paani sookh chuka ho.
Mere chehre ka har expression, meri aankhen, mera body language — sab kuch chillata hai ki main thik nahi hoon. Aur phir bhi, log bolte hain, “Kitna positive hai tu yaar!” Haan bhai, main positive hoon — COVID positive type thakaan wali positivity.
“Main Hamesha Hoon Tumhare Saath” – Bas Jab Unka Mood Ho
Log kehte hain, “Hum hamesha tumhare saath hain.” Matlab jab main ice cream khilaun, reels funny hoon ya weekend plan banaun — tab sab saath hain. Lekin jab main keh doon, “Bhai, main thoda low feel kar raha hoon,” tab sab busy ho jaate hain. Ek ne to “seen” kar ke bhi reply nahi kiya — WhatsApp ke tick ne bhi bola, “Apna time aayega…”
Jab mujhe sabse zyada zarurat hoti hai, tab main literally khud ko bhi apne saath feel nahi karta. Khali. Akela. Bas ek insaan mujhe real lagta hai — mera guru. Sirf woh hi hai jo bina kahe samajhta hai. Baaki sab ka toh “availability” sirf Insta stories tak limited hai.
Mood Swings – Sponsored by Loneliness Pvt. Ltd.
Kabhi main chup rehta hoon, toh log bolte hain, “Kya hua, period chal raha hai kya?” Arre bhai, mood swing ka gender hota hai kya? Dusre din kisi ne bola, “Tu toh har waqt irritated rehta hai.” Main kehna chaha, “Shayad isliye irritated hoon kyunki har waqt mujhe pretend karna padta hai ki sab theek hai.” Lekin maine kaha sirf, “Nahi yaar, bas thoda tired hoon.” Aur phir se ek fake smile.
Lekin ek baat socho — agar kisi ko lagta hai main upset hoon, toh woh yeh kyun nahi puchta baar-baar, “Kya hua? Bata na?” Kitni badi baat hoti agar koi 10 baar puch leta ki “Tu theek hai?” Nahi puchte kyunki unko sirf apni sukoon ki padi hai. Main unke liye bas ek mood fixer hoon. Ek teddy bear — hamesha ready to hug, kabhi na complain karne wala.
Meri Dosto Ka Wi-Fi Connection Emotional Support Pe Weak Hai
Meri Dost bolti hain, “Tum mujhe batate kyun nahi jab tum upset hote ho?” Aur jab main sach mein batana chahta hoon, toh ya toh unka mood nahi hota, ya woh bolti hai, “Koi na take your time, jabb lage bata dena”
Matlab main Amazon ka package ho gaya hoon kya? “Return anytime without questions.”
Main unko tab chaahta hoon jab mujhe lagta hai main toot jaunga. Lekin woh tab hoti hi nahi hai. Jab ukno zarurat ho, main available hoon. Jab mujhe ho, toh main invisible ho jata hoon.
Friends For Vibe, Not For Life
Mere doston ka bhi wahi haal hai. Jab mazak chahiye, chai pe charcha ho ya plans banane ho — tab main “bhai hoon.” Lekin jab main sirf 2 minute ka support chaahta hoon, tab sab ke sab “in meeting” ho jaate hain.
Ek baar main genuinely bura feel kar raha tha. Ek dost ko text kiya, “Bhai thoda baat karni hai.” Usne reply kiya 2 din baad — “Oh sorry, busy tha.” Main sochta raha, “Agar 2 minute mil jaate tab, shayad main thoda theek ho jaata.”
Lekin nahi. Sabko sirf happy version chahiye. Broken version se sabko allergy hai.
Toh Sun Lo Sab – Main Akela Hoon
Main bas ek baat kehna chahta hoon — agar tum mere sabse bure waqt mein mere saath nahi ho, toh tum mere best time ke bhi haqdar nahi ho.
Agar main akela feel kar raha hoon, toh iska matlab tum sab yahan nahi ho. Aur agar tum yahan nahi ho, toh sach yeh hai ki main akela hoon. Pura ka pura. Jitna bhi logon se ghira hoon, andar se main sirf ek grave mein khada hoon — zinda ho ke bhi mar jaane jaisa.
Ek Chhoti Si Baat, Lekin Dil Se:
Agar kabhi kisi ne yeh padha aur socha, “Yeh toh main bhi feel karta hoon,” toh bas itna kehna chahta hoon — tum akela nahi ho. Main bhi hoon, aur shayad aur bhi bohot log hain jo sirf ek “Tu theek hai?” sunna chahte hain.
Toh agla message kisi ka aayega, ya call, toh shayad unse puch lena — “Sach mein sab theek hai?” Shayad unka din bach jaaye.
Tum theek ho?